Deep inside my heart ...
I have been married for 4 years. My hubby is a loving, caring person, that in short I can say he is PERFECT hubby … for me la … he love me unconditionally, pamper me and spoilt me :P .After married, we move in to live with my hubby family, which consist of his brother’s family with 2 children, his sister whom already divorced, my mother in law and father in law and 2 maids … as at the time we could not afford to buy our own house and with da baby coming along we are better to save more for the baby expences …
So u can see how big da family is … at 1st can say no problem … coz that time I m to naive to know wat problem may arise … oh silly me … problem start to arise, well not to say problem la but then da true self or the true color of each family member is like slowly showing … they argue … yes they argue a lot and sometimes it got into very heated argument nearly fight … argue between my hubby’s brother with his wife, brother with sister, brother with mother in law, sister with mother in law … I was too shocked to say anything when this thing happen … in my mind was like I tot all this only happen in Tv drama (that’s y I say I m juz so naïve) but then it happen in real life n is infront of my eyes … all I ever did was grab my baby and run to my room and cry … I m too frightened, speechless … my hubby knew someday I would witness all this and he say sorry for bringing me into this and let me see all this incident … I m juz to afraid to say anything … but my hubby love towards me & my love for my hubby have somehow overcome the fear that I have inside me … for my hubby is my world … I cannot imagine my life without him …
As time goes by, I am now adapt well with the environment and knew wat should be done … should there be anything arise … I wanted to move out so much till to da extend that I even dreamt about it day and nite … I m goin cuckoo soon … with my 2nd princess on da way (very soon as I m already 35 weeks pregnant liao) we know that the room is juz to small to fit in all of us …
My hubby and myself wanted our very own house so much … we are now searching high n low for the suitable house … should we get a landed property or a condominium but … yes but we wont be moving in … if we were to move in also we will be bringing along MIL and FIL yes … then wat’s da point of moving out leh … no point right … we both know very well that we could not afford the living expences and this would be a burden for both of us … as FIL now is very sick and bedridden … every day my MIL would scold FIL. Till my hubby :( and sien with life … he have no mood to work and juz keep on thinking y is his family like this … where MIL always nag infront of him … he have no choice but to listen as he know his mother is so much more in pain than him … she have a very bad backache and yet still have to look after FIL … my MIL would not nag infront of his my hubby’s brother … (yes coz my MIL is da 2nd wife and my hubby is da only son she have) this add more pressure to my hubby … he love his mother very much.
This everyday argument have been like part of the daily life routine … sometimes in da middle of the nite i would hear my MIL shouting at my FIL … my hubby’s brother attitude towards this case is like “non of his “f****** business” yes sorry to say that … I can see and can feel it … when ask him to fetch FIL to see doctor her would say he have to work … no time … but whenever he got badminton session he can come home very early … aiya too sien with life already … or issit myself too “chup chiok”, too sensitive towards all this …
And after I give birth I will be staying at home for 2 months … I think I will gone nut soon everyday also hear the argument the scolding … I sure go nuts … my hubby tell me “u dun go nuts wo, or diagnose with any of those pregnancy blues la depression la” I tell him how can I prevent it wo if it comes, then it would comes right … but then I think I can cope it … wish me luck yeah …
I m very envy and jealous to those who dun have to stay with the PIL … how I wish I could move out soon …